health & development

Co Sleeping

Is it okay to let my newborn sleep in my bed? by The Babble Staff

November 28, 2006

Co-Sleeping

PRO-CO-SLEEPING

ANTI-CO-SLEEPING

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DR. SEARS
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DR. GREENE
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DR. COHEN
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DR.FERBER
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DR. SPOCK

THE BABBLE TAKE

American parents tend to want to sleep alone in their bed, placing their baby in a separate crib. The AAP cautions against co-sleeping on the grounds that parents might accidentally smother their infant. Until recently, co-sleeping was regarded by most as a vaguely suspect practice best left to hippies. But public opinion is changing. Several mainstream child-care experts, including Dr. Sears and Dr. Greene, now advocate some form of co-sleeping, and suggest it might prevent SIDS, provided proper measures are taken. Former sleep hard-liner Dr. Ferber has softened his approach and concedes that "children can sleep well during a wide range of circumstances." Still, Ferber does remind his readers that, while kids might sleep well in such an arrangement, their parents might not. He also describes a nightmare scenario: "twelve-year-olds who feel abnormal and unable to attend sleepovers due to needing to sleep in their parents' bed." Dr. Cohen counters that in his experience children who have co-slept during their first couple of years tend to come out as well-adjusted as those who slept in bassinets.

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    PRO CO-SLEEPING: Dr. Sears "What Attachment Parenting Is"

    Wherever all family members get the best night's sleep is the right arrangement for your individual family.

    Co-sleeping adds a nighttime touch that helps busy daytime parents reconnect with their infant at night. Since nighttime is scary time for little people, sleeping within close touching and nursing distance minimizes nighttime separation anxiety and helps baby learn that sleep is a pleasant state to enter and a fearless state to remain in.

    Why sleep sharing works: babies go to sleep better, babies stay asleep better, mothers stay asleep better, breastfeeding is easier, sleep sharing fits in with a busy lifestyle, etc.

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    PRO CO-SLEEPING: Dr. Greene "SIDS, The Family Bed, & The U.S. Consumer Products Safety Commission"

    Parents who choose to sleep with their babies (a wonderful choice for many families) should be taught how to do it safely. Anything that makes parents more difficult to wake up or anything that hinders babies' ability to breathe should be avoided. ...read the full article

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    NEUTRAL: Dr. Cohen, excerpt from The New Basics "Cosleeping"

    Based on my personal observations as a doctor, it doesn't make a difference. In the long run, the little guys who shared their parents' beds for the first few years are just as intelligent and emotionally well-developed as those who slept in bassinets. Another bit of common sense applies here: What you do when your kids are awake matters much more than what you do when they're asleep. ...read the full article

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    ANTI CO-SLEEPING: Dr. Ferber, excerpt from Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems

    You are free to choose the way that best suits you and your philosophy of parenting. . . If you chose co-sleeping, you must plan when and how to stop. Far too many families start co-sleeping early, assuming it will stop on its own at some point, and then find themselves years later with a five-, seven-, ten-, or twelve-year-old that they "can't get out of" their bed. The parents are unhappy and the child is embarrassed, feeling "different" and unable to host or attend sleepovers. ...read the full article

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    ANTI CO-SLEEPING: Dr. Spock, excerpt from Dr. Spock's Baby and Child Care

    Children can sleep in a room by themselves from the time they are born as long as the parents are near enough to hear them when they cry. An inexpensive intercom can help. If your child starts out sleeping in your room, two to three months is a good age to move her out: when she's sleeping through the night and doesn't need so much care. By six months, a child who regularly sleeps in her parents' room may become dependent on this arrangement and be unwilling to sleep anywhere else. It then often becomes harder to make the change to sleeping in a separate room, although it's never impossible.

ADDITIONAL LINKS

  • American Academy of Pediatrics Policy Statement: "The Changing Concept of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome"
  • Salon "Mind Your Own Kids"
  • The New York Times "And Baby Makes Three in One Bed,"
  • Slate "The Doctor Spock of Sleep: How Richard Ferber Became the Icon He Is."
  • Slate "The Science of baby Sleep: Dr. Ferber Revises His Famous Book and He Takes Aim at Parents."

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